Ko'u Honolulu

I'm trying to be patient and cool about what I am feeling towards a certain person.

Let's just name her Ms. Arrogant Wrong'un - oh yes SHE IS.

 

Ms. Arrogant Wrong'un thinks she's so great, that she can just blurt or state whatever she wants to say. All I can attest to is that she is quite a LIAR and FLIRT. The rest? Oh, I don't want to mention it - she is too much of every bad word there is in the world, to actually fit here (even if I have all the spaces available).

 

I'm leaving all emotions here.

 

Yes, I feel a little violated. Could it be an emotion triggered by an uncertain choice of pleasure and selfishness? Or a fleeting emotion of misunderstood actions? You tell me.

Yes, I want him for myself. But could I afford to steal him from someone who knows him better than I?

Could I, given the chance, be able to make him feel secure, happy and content like his present?

Yes, I am perplexed. Over the actions he showed me and apparently, the most astonishing ones I have not expected from him. Is it me? or are we on the same boat?

Yes, I think I have fallen again. Felt it once, though not brave enough to withstand all convictions and misinterpretations that have been going on in my head. A fight of reason and emotion, yes, I am falling in love again.

Yes, it is hurting me, at the most excruciating way. Keeping our friendship close while being emotionally distant. Is it ever possible?

Yes, I feel so contained. In a way, I am fully aware of what I should do, but couldn't. Is it not hard to be fighting over your feelings while being out there, pretending to be ok?

I cannot secede from what reality bites me. Should I hold on? Or let go? No, I couldn't withdraw.

Yes, I am frightened and threatened by him. I feel so vulnerable and vindicated whenever he is around in a way I perceive the situation to be better, with just the two of us.

Yes, I do not know what to do. To shun from him is like pulling away from what makes me feel anchored to the world. To keep my distance close is like crushing my heart, chamber per chamber, thinking of that painful fact.

Does he care about me? He is being a good friend, although at some moment, being flirtatious. Or shall I quote it, just being cool.

Oh please tell me, what do you have in mind? Who am I to you? Have you, by any chance, thought of wanting me as your significant other? Or is it just mere attraction?

You're breaking my heart, man.

So I am here in Omni, ate lunch out at SM and we're back here in the barracks.... Oh I want to fly already.

June 20-21 of this year 2009, my best girlfriends and I had the most wonderful and tight bonding EVER. On my multiply, you can see how much fun we are all having together. Some girls may say, its more fun if you're out with a bunch of guys, my girlfriends and I find ourselves on the contrary. In case you are not quite familiar with these people that I am talking about, check out my wiki page, and there you'll see 'em.

I am having such a great time with my girls! and the photos that I have uploaded on here are just some of 'those' treasured moments.

To Maggie Gersbach, Jen Hernandez, Karen Borja and Cherry Claveria, WE ARE THE PINOY SEX in the CITY. ) I love you girls, don't ever change. )))))

Let's all pretend like this is an email and that I am a tourist from somewhere across the planet.

WELCOME to the Philippines! These pictures aren't really all and everything you can SEE in the country, most were shot at some random places, really.
DSC00417 - One of the oldest rail transportation in the Philippines.
DSC00422 - Old dormitory situated along Quiapo road.
DSC00427 - Isetann building
DSC00423 - Terrible traffic jam is a normal thing here in the Philippines.
DSC00429 - ;p
DSC00460 - Basketball players. The PROs.
DSC00469 - 'life isn't all about the glitz and glam, it's always about how other people are affected because of selfish intentions and ruthless decisions'. On the photo, street child bathing under the rain.
DSC00472 - But people around here always find time to relax and contemplate over worldly values.
DSC01250 - Surplus stalls. Fashion for Less? Perfect place to be.
DSC01262 - 'Build a darn bridge to get over your troubles!'
DSC01338 -  Night life.

If you have read my multiply PM (personal message) for you folks, you would have seen my tita Kleyr's (family friend) photos taken in Australia. These pictures were shot at the The Twelve Apostles (Ocean Road), Canberra, Sydney and Melbourne. These pictures here are for those who would want to see the photo exhibit (held at the Podium) but weren't able to, last May 1 to 3

 

 

 

 

All Rights Reserved. Kleyr dela Cruz.

I don't know what the hell I want to do with my life. Spent a week thinking of what lies ahead of me. A week of sleepless brain torture. I think I'm going crazy already...I don't know. It's just weird. I am weird to be calling myself weird.

 

I used to think and dream of becoming one doctor someday. I wanted to help people who are sick and unabled. Aid people to be better and healthier in one way or the other. But it seems like, geez, I wanted to do something else. I'm too afraid to go against my loved ones' wills. I made one decision that will enormously affect my future. I thought of the consequences...and it turned out to have more cons than what I expected. Call me crazy but, I am lost. Really, really lost. I want to find my way back to the path I know my family would be proud of. But is that what I want for my life? I'm not sure. One week of thinking isn't enough for me to find the answers...